Monday, March 12, 2018


Salami ladies and gentlemen.

Nice to see you this fine warmer pday. Our week was interesting. We had a few highs and lows and an explosion at the main train station but whatever, normal stuff here in Germany.

Some highs: We taught a really cool 18 year old from Syria. This legend can speak quite good English and even better German. We taught him about the restored gospel and our beliefs and he was quite open and would love to learn more! The dope thing is how we came to teaching him. He was invited by some elders to play soccer every Saturday with us and just noticed that we were really nice people and wanted to know why we were so nice and seemed so happy. Boom. Roasted. Another high: We taught the first lesson to a Persian man and it was cool to be able to understand and communicate better in Farsi. Also it was a good lesson and our friend was pretty interested it seemed. Georg came to church and is still one of the most rock solid investigators that has set foot on this earth, we had also a friendly Italian friend of ours also make it (it’s a me, Mario!).

A low part of our week: We had a very packed Saturday full of 5 appointments and a street display, and every single one of our appointments fell out. That happens every now and then haha. But the street display was fun talked to a few legends. We spent a lot of time on Friday going to potential friends of the church of the Turkish origin but no one had interest really. We talked to many Turks, I understood like nothing, and all but one woman had no interest. But we’ll see if something comes from our Turkish lady that wants to meet again and talk about the Mormon Kitabi. Also our good friend Faiz wasn’t able to make it to church again, so that means we’ll be having to work with him some more a little bit longer to help him prepare to be baptized. He is really an awesome guy.

Freezing Cold Street Display

Explosion? At one of the largest train stations in Germany? Yes, that was seen by me live. On Sunday, we headed over to Hauptbahnhof to meet with our zone leaders to make a quick exchange for our Turkish speaking comps to visit a man of the Turkish origin (who ended up not being home). I was with Elder Parry again and we started off doing some finding over there and got roasted by a lot of people. We talked to a man who’s actually an investigator of the Elders in Altona, which was cool. He told us he had lost contact for the past few weeks with them and really wanted to meet again because he’s interested to learn more, so we could give that further on the Altona elders, which was cool! He told us it was no accident that we met that night. Then as we headed back into the train station to meet up with a friend from Eritrea, we heard quite the ruckus going on over by one of the trains. There was a large group of people all kinda yelling and screaming and chanting and everything you can think of. As we watched (from a safe distance) next thing I see is a big white flash accompanied by a fairly large💥BANG💥. Interested, came many people over near us as we had a great view of it. No longer than 45 seconds later, a large squadron of German riot police came guarded with helmets and shields to go calm the crowd down. About 2 minutes later came another large group of police. No tear gas was thrown or shots were shot but it was insane. I couldn’t tell you what the bang was. It was loud enough to have been a half stick of dynamite, a blank from a gun, whatever your imagination allows it to be. For those 10-15 minutes no trains came in or out of the giant train station and it was crazy. Sick that I got to experience that in real life, but glad none of us got hurt. Could’ve been potentially pretty bad.

Well, those were pretty much the big parts of our week. Hope you have found entertainment through the digital reading of this large collections of letters forming words which formed sentences which formed paragraphs which finally formed a new weekly from yours truly.

Much fun this week 👊🏼

a tasty dish I made all myself (yes mother, myself)

we rolled weighted spheres in the direction of weighted down shaped pieces of plastic with the goal of knocking as many over as possible

Elder Glenn Johnson
Kirche Jesu Christi
Heckengang 55
21079 Hamburg

Monday, March 5, 2018

Back to the Promised Land

Well my friends, this week went by quite speedily.

We had 3 different exchanges this week, which was a little nuts. My first Tausch was with Elder Parry, one of our zone leaders. We had a pretty good time despite the fact that it took about 20 minutes to walk a normal 5 minute walk. The highlights were: a dope lesson with Georg about priesthood and temples, got some delicious Döner from Fresh Kebabs, talked to most likely half of the population of Hamburg, and ended up our Tausch with a dope family home evening led by the senior couple, the Storeys. Let me just tell you a bit about these 2 legends. They are from California, Elder Storey expects himself to become an apostle some day (even though he’s far from it 😉), and they understand jokes quite well. We played some games, had a spiritual thought, and then we were blessed with some tasty banana bread afterwards as I taught one of our investigators from Italy how to play „Do What is Right“ on the piano.

the legends, not the Stewart’s though unfortunately 

The next day I headed down to Hannover to go on Tausch with this elder called Elder Smartt. He’s currently companions with Elder Neale, the group leader for Persian in our mission, so I got sent over to work with him. Highlights: We met a woman polygamist, who was quite interesting. She was actually interested in our church and wants to meet with us again, but needless to say we passed her information on to the sisters there. We froze at a street display for the entire day on Thursday, we had temperatures from 23 degrees Fahrenheit as a high, all the way down to about 8 degrees where it stayed with a stabbing wind haha. Other than almost losing our ears and faces, it wasn’t too bad.

The last Tausch of the week was definitely the most legendary of them all. It started with an hour delay because Interviews with President were delayed which is classic but it was all good. The legend Elder Hillyard and I finally made our way down to the promised land of Brandenburg an der Havel, where some of the greatest people in Germany reside. We had time to visit 2 legends. We were first with Sister Musehold, the sweet old lady that the previous Elder Oliver and I brought to the temple, and we had a great appointment. Just like the good old days. Afterwards we had evening bread with most likely the greatest family in this country, the Osbecks. The time with them was amazing, and also way too short. But nevertheless, we had an awesome time. We also did a thing or two the next day in Berlin, including feasting from the greatest Döner in this country, Babelsberg, playing a bit of basketball in which I almost beat Hillyard, and some other random things. We became phones.

Sister Musehold, the Angel (dig those matching ties!)

The greatest Doner (back with Elder Hillyard)

Other than that, we just froze this week. Never thought I would miss 80 degree winters so much.

Not much more I feel like saying so bye Felicia

Elder Glenn Johnson
Kirche Jesu Christi
Heckengang 55
21079 Hamburg

Monday, February 26, 2018


Merhaba boys and girls nasilsin. çokiyi? iyi.

Vell (cue Oakys accent), this week was interesting for sure. Funny story to start you boys off today. I was blessed to go on splits with the Australian nephew of Steve Irwin (not really, would be cool though) and that was great. It’s hard to remember he’s Australian as I talk to him about American things and it just goes right over his head. Anyways we were on a bus during our exchange, and the bus gets on the freeway for some reason. We were the only people still standing up, because there were no 2-seaters for us both to sit down, so we stayed standing and he was telling me quite an intriguing story. After a few minutes of driving the bus driver gets on his intercom thing and says in a heavy heavy German accent „Could yoü please sit down so sat vee can drrife a little bit fastah?“ so that was awesome. We were thinking it probably took him a few minutes to look up all those words because we were already on the Autobahn for about 5 minutes before he said that. Germans and English, man, wonderful combination.

Tausch with the credible hunter himself, Elder Denny

Oh man, we had an interesting lesson this week. We brought one of our Afghani friends of the church to our Persian speaking members house, and that didn’t play out too well. This man, being quite defensive of the Qur’an and his beliefs, thought our words were absolute nonsense. He had a very hard time grasping the concept of „believing without seeing,“ as he argued very hard that there must be proof of the Book of Mormon (which there is, but it’s useless telling them to him) or there’s not truth whatsoever. I think my favorite part, though, was when he started on one of his rants earlier in the lesson, and it started getting heated between literally only himself. But as he was going off, he stopped, looked at our Persian member and says „One moment. Do you have some tea or something? We’re going to need some tea,“ in the most sassy way ever—it was quite amazing. Unfortunately not much came out of the lesson except that we convinced him to give it a try and read a good amount in the book before he shoots down that idea.

I was back in Berlin this past week for exchanges as well and that was great. Fun to be back in that apartment in Tiergarten since my stay there back in the legendary days. We’re back in contact with Faiz, working on meeting with him again, but it hasn’t worked out yet. We won’t give up on him though.

Interesting last names at a place we rang at. Oldenburg is a dope last name, Haar (hair) is also quite an interesting last name. 

Something I found quite interesting this week, was at a lesson with Jason, our new convert. We had a lesson and read in the Book of the Mormons with him (what most Germans call it) and had an overall good lesson. Once we were finished he prayed for the closing, and right before he ended the prayer he said, „Well Heavenly Father, I wish you also a beautiful evening,“ which was interesting. It was funny at first because that’s not usually said in prayers (at least from what I’ve heard) but why? Sometimes during our prayers we can focus too much on ourselves and things we want/need, but maybe God would like us to be thinking about Him as well as ourselves. Just an interesting thought, carry on now with your day and try to be less selfish next time you pray.

Sick. Peace aüt

it’s getting chilly here -12 degrees this coming week

Elder Glenn Johnson
Kirche Jesu Christi
Heckengang 55
21079 Hamburg

Monday, February 19, 2018

I Willn‘t Do That

Well hello there, nice to be back with you on quite the sunny surprise of a pday here in Hamburg.

So you’re wondering what I did this week? Most likely not, but you get to find out anyways. Probably the highlight of my week was the beginning. After having some meetings and an interview, we hopped on a train towards Braunschweig, where the other one had exchanges with the Turkish speaking elder there, Elder Miller, from Gilbert Arizona. Unfortunately for him, he went to Higley High School, but as we talked more we found out we were at the same music festival about 3 summers ago, pretty neat. Anyways, he was a legend but more importantly was that I saw my treasure Elder Hofeling, the only person on this living earth to have taken more L‘s at a ZoKo than thought humanly possible. He is all over the keyboard. We had quite the fun time catching up after all these years since the days of the reign of the Oldenburg district. We were also blessed to take part in their District meeting, which includes a district of literally only legends. We’ve got Elder Searle, the fearless „1 goal is enough“ legend district leader, then his companion the one and only Elder Wehrend, from whom myths are written, wie herrlich sind die Beine, amazing man. Then we had the other two that I’ve previously described, and that was just the perfect recipe for an amazing district meeting, and rest of our exchange.

my legends, wehrend and hofeling #dreamdritt


On our way back home one day we were waiting for our S Bahn to take us home to Harburg, as the train across from us kinda stays at the platform for longer than usual. Then come 2 Deutsche Bahn Security people, who go in to the Bahn and rip out these two dudes who didn’t want to leave that train. At one point they were being carried by the back of the pants, no way that didn’t hurt, and after that the security brought out like 3 empty large bottles of vodka. Afterwards the guys kinda just gave up and decided to just sleep on the ground next to the train, probably their next best idea.

goodnight friends

Besides that, we had an English lesson with Rebecca the legend herself, and that was fun. I taught her all the important rules that most Americans forget like „willn‘t“ „you’re & your being freely interchangeable“ and a couple other good ones I forgot.

We also had a lesson with a man from Afghanistan which went quite well. He’s a little crazy, but there might be something there. We invited him to church, and he did end up coming during the last 15 minutes of church just to come tell us he’s feeling sick so he can’t come haha. لِگِند. The best news of our week was when our good friend Faiz got back into contact with us. We were quite worried for him that something happened and somehow he couldn’t get ahold of us but everything’s okay. He is dealing with family problems and needed some alone time to deal with it. We are grateful that he’s back with us and that we can now continue helping him towards baptism. The Lord does miracles.

In the Book of Mormon Book of Moroni chapter 7:29, we read And because he hath done this, my beloved brethren, have miracles ceased? Behold I say unto you, Nay; neither have angels ceased to minister unto the children of men. We still see miracles daily. Pray for yourself to be able to see the miracles that we could be able to see every day and there will be a difference.



Elder Glenn Johnson
Kirche Jesu Christi
Heckengang 55
21079 Hamburg

Monday, February 12, 2018


Merhaba boys and girls,

Great to see you back. The beginning of this week was sad because it was time for Elder Hillyard to bid himself goodbye to some of the greats that we have here in Hamburg. We were also blessed with an awesome member of our ward, Beccy, who made us some awesome insanely comfy blankets with freaking dog paws. Even though I was tempted to just sit down in a seat as I helped him get into his train to Berlin, it was time to say goodbye. RIP Elder Hillyard, he will be missed.

stupid ice taking my boy away (rip hillyard)
our legendary blankets (rip hillyard)
Other than that, I received later the new one called Morrell, and nothing too exciting happened that day. Friday we met with our legends Georg and Faiz. Georg is an interesting one to teach now. We’ve been teaching him for more than 6 months now, so he knows about everything that we teach to investigators, so it’s not always too easy to figure out a lesson for him. We focused on the temple this time, and he’s quite excited to be able to make it over there after his baptism. With Faiz, we had also a great lesson. We finished the rest of the points that we needed to teach him, focusing on priesthood and the temple, and the importance of going to church. He accepted it all really great, Brother Troke also helped greatly in our lesson, and it was just awesome overall. The next day he had his baptismal interview! Of course he destroyed it and we were all really excited for him to be baptized this next Saturday. Unfortunately he didn’t make it to church yesterday so we’re going to have to move the baptism back a week or two :/ but that’s alright. More important that he’s 100% ready and prepared than to be baptized quicker.

our legend Faiz (rip hillyard)

We were asked to help a few ladies from the Tafel that we work with to help them clean out and take some stuff to the dump out of one of their apartments and it was pretty....let’s say...not too hygienic lol. Luckily I had worn gloves cuz it was cold—because otherwise I’d probably be home by now with a case of every cancer there is. It was a fun time though, it’s always great to serve others and spread the love of Christ. Later that day, we had a ward activity called Fasching. Someone explained it to me and as best as I can remember they said it was a little similar to Mardi Gras, which helps me not at all because I’m Arizonan. Everyone dressed up in costumes and we played some fun games together. Overall a fun time.

On Saturday as we were walking home, I heard two people speaking English with each other nowhere near a place where one would usually hear English (i.e., train station, airport, tourist attractions) so I hit the legends with a „Hold up, where are you guys from?“ and we started a legendary conversation with some Brits from Manchester. Once we explained that we’re missionaries from the Mormon church, the man said, „Oh no not you guys. Your people attacked me in England“ (cue the trash Hillyard British accent) „Okay, well, maybe attacked isn’t the right word; but they never would leave me alone!“ And then they had to go take their dog for a walk and they were expecting someone soon so in other words they didn’t want to be „attacked“ by us either. Pretty funny experience, haha.

Anyways that’s about it for this week folks. I finished Genesis in the German bible just a few days ago and learning all about how legendary Moses is. I definitely recommend reading some scriptures, it’s.....Spa

we conquered the moose (rip hillyard)

rip hillyard


Elder Glenn Johnson
Kirche Jesu Christi
Heckengang 55
21079 Hamburg

Monday, February 5, 2018

Lily Exposed Me

Good afternoon ladies and gentlemen,

I would like to extend you a warm welcome back.

You must be asking yourself, what’s happening with the legendary companionship that was Elders Johnson and Hillyard of the Wilhelmsburg area in Hamburg? Well, apparently it’s the will of our leaders that we get split. Elder Hillyard is being ripped away from me and being taken to Neukölln, a suburb of Berlin. Good thing he learned enough Turkish here to fend for himself out there in the Ghettos of Berlin. I am being tied down here and given a new elder called Morrell. The legends are being separated though after a good 5 months and it’s just downhill from here. Just kidding, haha, but we’ll see how it goes with the new companion and everything.

Legendary District

Other than that, we had a great week. We had an awesome lesson with Faiz, where we focused only on tithing—what it means, where the law comes from, and why we do it. To our surprise, he didn’t have anything against it, understood it very well, and agreed to pay it after he’s baptized. Much more legendary gets it not. Unfortunately he didn’t make it to church, because he pulled a Hillyard and broke his screen and couldn’t use his phone so he didn’t know where the church was.


We had another couple good appointments this week, one in which something pretty funny happened. We had an eating appointment with our Bishop and his family yesterday, and it was time for us to give our little spiritual thought. Well as many of you don’t know, a member in Brandenburg gifted me a deck of magic cards and showed me a few magic tricks, the perfect way to lead in to the tricks of Satan and how to see them. Well I prepared for my magic trick before we started so nobody knew, I hid a card inside of a nearby book, to use as my final trick. Right as I am starting the magic for the family and their small kids, one of the little babies, Lily, is walking around doing some nonsense when she reaches for the book. Nervously, I reach over to kinda nonchalantly stop her, but there was no stopping her. She opened the book, revealing the card, exposing my trick. We all had a good long laugh over that one, and the rest of my tricks worked except that one haha.

my boy

Well folks that’s about all for this week, stay lit and have a lot of fun these next 7 days.


Elder Glenn Johnson
Kirche Jesu Christi
Heckengang 55
21079 Hamburg

Monday, January 29, 2018

Arizonans..the new wannabe Utahns?


I feel to address first the subject of this email. Yesterday my companion, Elder Kevin Oliver Hillyard explained to me of his strong belief that „Arizonans are wannabe Utahns“. He explained further and narrowed it down to mostly Mesa and Gilbert have the wannabe Utahns, and this is all based off his judgement of the <20 citizens of Arizona he has met. I just thought this was the most absurd statement I’ve ever heard come from his mouth, so we had a good hour long friendly discussion on why he is absolutely wrong. You could say I won, as he at the end admitted that I was correct.

Anyways, great to have you all back. This week was a fun one for us. We had yet another Zone Conference, in which we learned that Elder Robert Nay and some other Römer guy created an app. It’s like a translation app for members of the church to help us when we meet people who don’t speak any normal languages like German, English, or Persian. It’ll be interesting to see the app start off and see if it works.

Hamburg and Neumünster Zones

After the conference, we had a great lesson with Georg, which President Fingerle asked if he could come to. After Georg roasted us a little bit, we had an awesome lesson about the Plan of Salvation and we were able to give him a sick blessing and it was overall awesome. The spirit was strong at our lesson.

Me, Elder Hillyard, Georg, and President Fingerle

We also had the blessing to have another appointment with Faiz this week. We went through a lesson we’ve already taught, but with pamphlets in his language, so that was great. He seemed to grasp the concept even better, and strengthen his faith. He is about halfway finished with the Book of Mormon too, which is awesome. He also told us that he’s doing really well with not drinking coffee. He said his friends and girlfriend are like what da heck you’re crazy! But he has told them his beliefs and not succumbed to peer pressure, which is an awesome miracle!

Anyways, no crazy storms or anything this week. We had a district Pday and me and Hillyard destroyed at volleyball like usual. We also find out this Saturday about transfers. It’s likely that Elder Hillyard leaves me, but we’re hoping to break the norm so he can finish his mission in the best city with the best companion he’ll ever have.

Anyways stay thirsty my friends, bye!

Elder Glenn Johnson
Kirche Jesu Christi
Heckengang 55
21079 Hamburg

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